fish8me.com

came home messed up and immediately opened the Bible and “What the Buddha taught” and started reading. reading for answers. reading for peace. and WOW.

randomly opening the Good Book, one of the first verses that jumps out at me:

Mark 2:27 Then Jesus said to them, “The Sabbath was made for man, not man for the Sabbath.”

judging by how He was trying to reform Jewish customs at the time, was He saying “don’t be a slave TO DOCTRINE”?? that while overly concerning and immersing yourself in the technical theological aspects of the religion, YOU MIGHT MISS THE REAL MESSAGE????? the Truth??

forgive me if this seems uncharacteristically cryptic, but i’m just typing from the heart here, because my head is in a mess. and these are the first things that come out.

In the sky, there is no distinction of east and west; people create distinctions out of their own minds and then believe them to be true.
The Buddha

if there’s ONE thing i have learnt from law school:

not everything is as easy as black and white. good or bad. right or wrong.

choice is an easy word to use, but SOME things aren’t as clear cut as that word implies.

you CHOOSE to have these emotions. you CHOOSE to want what you want.

but this goes beyond a stupid philosophical or ideological debate. WAY beyond that. and WAY more important to me.

i feel like. crap. frustrated. yet i don’t feel angry. instead of anger, its just: hollow. and churning. and weird.

No one saves us but ourselves. No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path.
The Buddha

and some measure of acceptance. because denial is a terrible thing. i try not to do that.

but like i said, choices aren’t always easy to be made. and sometimes they don’t even present much of a choice.

when you know from the start its going to hurt, what possesses people to stick their hand in boiling water anyway? knowing full well nothing good can come from it.

maybe its hope. and the reason we have hope is so that we can accomplish the difficult things. so that we can gain fulfillment.

maybe its stupidity. and the reason we have stupidity is population control. hey, SOMEONE’s gotta be at the bottom of the ladder.

and maybe its arrogance. arrogance that we know what we are doing and we know the cause and effect of things. AND THAT WE ARE ALWAYS RIGHT.

even when we’re not.

“you don’t understand.” “you won’t understand” “you can’t understand”

is the most condescending, sanctimonious, stupidest load of crap i have ever heard.

HOW CAN YOU ASSUME I WON’T UNDERSTAND IF YOU DON’T EVEN TRY ?@?@!?!?!??!$?#@#5>@!?@$#^%?@#$^@#$%^$@%^$%^$^

Anyway.

Let us rise up and be thankful, for if we didn’t learn a lot today, at least we learned a little, and if we didn’t learn a little, at least we didn’t get sick, and if we got sick, at least we didn’t die; so, let us all be thankful.
The Buddha

at least we didn’t die.